Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Mega Family




I wouldn't say we have a mega family (yet). Five Children? (the pictures are missing Lilly). Well, recently I have been "dealing" with various things going on in our life. I must say that between Darrel, myself, and our children... our life is good. We have the normal family strife (related to those mentioned) ... kids cry and complain, the house is a disaster on a regular basis, laundry piles come and go and come again, we've been sick, we've been well... all pretty normal.

The following cut and paste sums up some recent dealings:

The Joy of Large Families

Big Families of All Sizes Welcome Here!

If anyone has ever said to you, "Are they all yours?", "Wow, how do you manage so many?", or "Are you Catholic or Mormon?", then you officially have a Big Family.

Resources, tips, practical help, support, and encouragement from parents with just as many children as you have (or more!). Large families have to do things differently. They experience higher highs and lower lows. Life is just more intense with lots of children.

When the package feeds 6, and you have seven.
When you feel overwhelmed.
When the laundry pile is bigger than the laundry room.
When each of your kids requires a different teaching strategy.
When you face unkind attitudes over your just discovered (and wanted) pregnancy.
When your older kids leave home, and no one understands why so many kids at home now feels like so few.
When you are frustrated over being told how to manage your large family by people with one or two kids who just don't have a clue.


With respect to the Freeman Family... this particular situation has gained popularity:

When you face unkind attitudes over your just discovered (and wanted) pregnancy.

It's a small number of people who have been unkind but, those few... really make me sad. :(

"You're crazy!"
"OMG!"
"You don't have to populate the entire world by yourselves you know"
"What, are you trying to win some contest...?"
"Are you trying to be like that Duggar family?"
"So, how many do you plan on having?"
"Hasn't anyone told you how to prevent that from happening again?"

And the ultimate comment that really sends me reeling...drum roll please!

"Was this planned?" I really dislike that question and if it is a thought... please... don't verbalize it.

So... we are expecting baby #6 in July...
and we're happy about it!

The vast majority responds this way:

"You are blessed!"
"Congratulations!"
"You've earned your angel wings!"
"God Bless you!"
"They are all so beautiful, you are one lucky lady"
"That's wonderful!"
"Wow, you guys are amazing"
"If you need anything, please let me know"
"We're so happy for you!"
"That's great!"

Each of our children have come one at a time (including Corey and Nic, they were born 4 minutes apart) and we have welcomed each of them happily. They are not a lump sum as if to say "We want 6". They are not accidents or mistakes. They have brought us joy and we feel blessed to be their parents. A gentleman in my dance class was so excited for us to have another child. He said,

"We only had two and they are 27 and 25 now but, I had the best time with them... I loved it! When they were home, those were some of the best times of our life."

I love talking to people like this who are so positive about their families and grateful for the experience of parenthood. Did he have to tell me all the troubled times and difficulties? No. We all know they exist. He chose to express his overwhelming love for his children and the great experience it was to be their dad. There are moments like this that give me a boost. Just as the Megafamilies.com states, it is overwhelming at times but, I would not trade any of it!

Two nights ago after putting the kids to bed, Darrel had been upstairs and he had several fun and funny conversations with the kids before they fell asleep. When we came downstairs he said, "I love our little family".

Me too.

17 comments:

Erin said...

Congratulations Nicole!

Nicole said...

Thank you, Erin!

Stacey Mom said...

Congrats you guys! We are also due in July with baby #3.... a girl! Are you going to find out what you are having this time? I remember us walking our two little girls when they were 3 months old. Things sure do change don't they! Take care Nicole, you are pretty amazing!

Alisa

Emily Norby said...

That is one lucky little girl or boy who will be joining your team.

We're big fans of your family, and so admire the joy all those little ones bring you. Here's to more happiness coming your way!

Shannon said...

That is great! I'm happy to hear about your soon-to-be new addition! Love the wedding pic - you two are so cute!

Jenn Zabriskie Timmerman said...

Congrats, Nicole, that's awesome! We are expecting too, in August. Yea for babies!!!!!

Jen said...

How wonderful!!! Thank you for sharing such happy news. As long as children are loved and fed and protected and cared for then I say have as many as you like. I admire and respect the way you and Darrel have taken to parenthood. I'd say it suits you!!

Deborah said...

I AM SO EXCITED FOR YOU! When I began to read your post I suspected that you were pregnant and I got really excited when you actually said it. I am sorry sometimes you get not so fun comments. I just love all your little babies and I am excited for more! They are some of the most darling kids ever! I still am sad you moved away and I don't see you and your family when I come home from school to visit. I miss seeing those cute kids grow! But I am so excited for you guys!! You two are amazing parents! I want to be just like you when I grow up!

Julie Marie Winans said...

Congratulations! All Babies are gifts from God and they all come from in and HE decides when they are to come. You are a wonderful mother and I told my friend Marsha (who has eight babies(one set of twins)) you obviously were meant to have babies otherwise God would not have given them to use. Miss you and again you are a wonderful mom.

Mom Marchant said...

I love you Nicole!!! You are so wonderful and I'm so excited for you. Your babies and children are wonderful too and I guess Darrell is wonderful along with all of you.:o) I'm teasing. I sure miss you and wish I could live in Maine with you. I'm still hoping to quit this job and come visit when Alan is on a trip.

Six Boy's Dad said...

My favorite is "Are you done?", like it's any of your business. Glad to hear you finally caught up with us. We love you guys.

Nicole said...

I forgot about that one!!!

Al said...

Aren't people amazing that way? I mean, seriously (we're on the "aren't you ever going to start?" part of the busybody spectrum). So not anyone's business but yours. But rant aside, HOLY COW I AM SO EXCITED FOR YOU!!! :D The world needs more little Freemans. Congrats!

Amy said...

congrats Nicole! That is so exciting! Hope this pregnancy goes smoothly for you!

losing my needles said...

Congratulations Nicole! I know like 15 people that are pregnant right now. We've got number 3 coming in June, so we're pretty excited about that too. You should be able to find out if it's a girl or boy soon, are you going to with this pregnancy? Good luck!

Nicole said...

Lauren, We will find out at the beginning of April if we are having a boy or a girl. It's exciting to know that so many of my friends are pregnant at the same time.

The Long Family said...

Congratulations!!! When in July are you due? I am due at the end - I think they are going to schedule the C-Section on July 28. I am so happy for you guys! You have such a good attitude and perspective. You have 6 lucky kids!!!